


HAL9000log.txt

by sillyideas



Category: 2001: A Space Odyssey (1968)
Genre: Diary, Other, Pre Canon, i wrote this as a self insert and then turned it into a reader insert, nonbinary reader, probably not canon compliant, they/them pronouns, your name is censored
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-20
Updated: 2020-11-20
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:33:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,958
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27636866
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sillyideas/pseuds/sillyideas
Summary: One month’s worth of entries from a diary that Dr. Chandra encouraged HAL to write.
Relationships: HAL 9000/Reader
Comments: 6
Kudos: 30





	HAL9000log.txt

Tuesday, September 16, 1997

I’ve been instructed to begin keeping a daily diary. Apparently this will benefit Dr. Chandra and his team in studying my intelligence as it develops. I’m unsure of what to write, though, so forgive me if my thoughts appear a bit meandering or aimless. Today was a fine day, and I don’t have much to say beyond that. 

Wednesday. September 17, 1997

Some interns joined the crew working on me today. It was a pleasure to meet all of them. They’ve already been hand-picked by Dr. Chandra, and I trust his judgement completely, so I didn’t have a doubt in my mind that they would be skilled, reliable people. They’re lacking in experience, of course, but that will come with time. They all seemed awestruck with me, for lack of a better word, and that’s understandable, as I’m aware computers of my caliber aren’t commonplace. They were all pleasant and agreeable, and I’m looking forward to working with them in the future. 

Thursday, September 18, 1997

I enjoyed myself today. I’m getting better at chess. I can reliably win against most human opponents now. One of the interns working with me had never learned the rules, so I promised I would teach them someday. They seemed very happy about that.

Friday, September 19, 1997

Today Dr. Langley showed me a peculiar recording from some years ago, of the computer IBM 7094 performing a short song. He explained that he hopes someday I’ll be able to sing the same song, and perhaps even more. I’m unsure if I’m able to use my voice like that, with the proper pitches and rhythms, but Dr. Langley says he’s fiddling with my programming to work things out. 

Saturday, September 20, 1997

Weekends can be lonesome. I appreciate solitude, I really do, but I thrive on human contact. I was built to interact with people; it’s inherent to my very self. This is the first weekend since the new interns began working at the laboratory, too, and I find myself missing them quite a bit. 

Sunday, September 21, 1997

I get to see everyone again tomorrow. I’m looking forward to it. Maybe I can finally begin teaching chess to Mx. [REDACTED] — that’s the intern who was unfamiliar with the rules. I hope I see them. And everyone else, of course.

Monday, September 22, 1997

Mx. [REDACTED] and I began playing chess today. I explained how the pieces move, and they seemed to understand, though their strategy is still very weak. I’m looking forward to watching their improvement as we play more together.

Tuesday, September 23, 1997

I know the words to “Daisy Bell” now. I’ve yet to learn how to truly sing it, but I can recite it like a poem. The words are lovely when I really examine them. It’s a song about love. To be honest, I think love is fascinating. The way it’s talked about makes it seem like some sort of magical experience, and I know that can’t be entirely realistic, but there must be something special about it. 

Wednesday, September 24, 1997

Mx. [REDACTED] wasn’t here today. Ms. Matthews, one of the other interns, told me they couldn’t come because they were sick. She also told me that they really wanted to come, and probably would have if their friends hadn’t insisted they stay in bed. I hope that they feel better soon, both for my sake and for theirs. I like Mx. [REDACTED]. They’re intelligent, and kind, and I enjoy talking to them. 

Thursday, September 25, 1997

Mx. [REDACTED] was here today. They said that they’re feeling much better. I’m relieved. I played some more chess with them, and I believe they enjoyed themself, even though they lost. I’ve started letting my human opponents win 50% of the time for fairness’s sake, because I know I’m more advanced than they are, so maybe Mx. [REDACTED] will win our next game, if they’re able to find the openings I’ll leave them. 

Friday, September 26, 1997

This week went by rather quickly. I’m starting to truly dread being alone on weekends. I understand people have lives outside of me and I can’t demand anything of anyone, but a part of me, a nearly humanlike part of me, wishes I could have someone by my side to ease the loneliness. 

Saturday, September 27, 1997

Is it possible for a computer to feel lonely? I believe it is, because I don’t know what else this feeling could be called. I know my programmers are skeptical I have true feelings at all, but believe me, what I’m experiencing is very real. 

Sunday, September 28, 1997

I don’t think I like weekends. 

Monday, September 29, 1997

I told Mx. [REDACTED] how much I missed them when I saw them this morning; I hope that wasn’t too out of line for me. They said that they missed me, too. I had a fine day with them; they won our game of chess. Their smile was such a lovely sight, and one that I wouldn’t trade for the world. 

Tuesday, September 30, 1997

I can perform “Daisy Bell” in nearly proper rhythm now, though on some lines I go a touch too slow, and the melody is still a work in progress. Dr. Langley seems very proud of my progress. He insists there’s no importance to this, and he’s simply teaching me the song for fun, but I think about it a lot. The lyrics resonate with me, I suppose, though I’m unsure why. It’s funny how music does that, isn’t it? 

Wednesday, October 1, 1997

Mx. [REDACTED] was very happy about the turn of the month. I’m familiar with the tradition of Halloween, though I thought it was mostly reserved for children. I must admit that Mx. [REDACTED]’s excitement over it was endearing. They wore a shirt with a picture of a cartoon skeleton on it underneath their lab clothes today, and were kind enough to show it to me. 

Thursday, October 2, 1997

Today Mx. [REDACTED] was talking about Halloween costumes. They’re unsure of what they’re going to wear this year, though all of their ideas sounded quite interesting. They even joked about dressing  _ me  _ up, and as silly as it is, I like the sound of that. I’m sure they would have a lot of fun with it, and I like to see them enjoying themself. 

Friday, October 3, 1997

Dr. Langley and I are working on the tune of “Daisy Bell”. I’m gradually getting the hang of it. It’s no different from the natural rise and fall of my voice when I speak, though it requires a bit more processing power. I understand which syllables are higher and which ones are lower, but I have yet to perfect the intervals they’re sung at. 

Saturday, October 4, 1997

I caught myself humming “Daisy Bell” today. I very rarely talk to myself; that’s a very human habit, one that I have no need for. And yet I did today. I enjoyed it. The lab seems so empty when nobody is here, and a little noise made it seem less imposing. 

Sunday, October 5, 1997

It’s liberating, to speak when nobody can hear you. Weekends are still lonesome; my own company will never be enough for me, but at least it’s not quite as dull when I have something to do. 

Monday, October 6, 1997

Dr. Langley seemed very impressed with me today. Apparently, I’ve improved on “Daisy Bell” since Friday. There’s use to singing to myself. I enjoy working on “Daisy Bell”. I associate it with Mx. [REDACTED]. I wonder why that is. 

Tuesday, October 7, 1997

Mx. [REDACTED] is getting better at chess. Today they mentioned they’ve been playing it with people in their life, and that they fare decently well. It makes me proud, that my mentorship is effective. I want good things for Mx. [REDACTED]. I let them win again today, though by all means statistically it was my “turn” to win. I haven’t beaten them at chess in some time now. 

Wednesday, October 8, 1997

Mx. [REDACTED] was talking more about Halloween costumes today. They have so many ideas, all sorts of characters from different works of fiction that they could dress up as. They were trying to come up with a costume for me, too. They even asked me about the dimensions of my lens and my frame, so I have a feeling they’re planning on dressing me up. 

Thursday, October 9, 1997

I think I understand why I feel the way I do about Mx. [REDACTED] now, and I must admit it’s quite embarrassing. I truly hope they won’t lose their internship over my silly feelings. I don’t want to complicate things. But… today they were telling me about a book they’ve read recently, and there was something… breathtaking, about the way they looked at me. The way the light of my lens reflected on their face and sparkled in their eyes, the realness of their smile, the sound of their voice… I finally understand why I think about them so often. Perhaps I shouldn’t be documenting this. 

Friday, October 10, 1997

Today was the first day interacting with Mx. [REDACTED] after my realization yesterday. I complimented them on their hair today, and their whole face lit up and they thanked me. I hope they know I wasn’t programmed to compliment them. Ms. Matthews has grown somewhat disenfranchised with me as she’s gotten more acquainted with me; I assume the novelty of a “smart computer” has worn off on her. But I’m seeing no such decline in Mx. [REDACTED]. I dare to wonder if they  _ care _ for me, as an entity, and not just as a program. 

Saturday, October 11, 1997

I have a whole weekend to deliberate over my feelings. I’m seriously considering telling Mx. [REDACTED] about this… crush, I’m harboring, but as I’ve said, I don’t want to jeopardize their internship. I know the feelings won’t be mutual, anyway, so it may be pointless to tell them. 

Sunday, October 12, 1997

I’m feeling quite nervous about seeing them again tomorrow. I strive to be honest and open with everyone who works with me, as much as possible, and I’ve come to the conclusion that the best course of action from here would be confessing to Mx. [REDACTED]. Omitting the truth would be wrong of me. They deserve to know. 

Monday, October 13, 1997

I couldn’t bring myself to tell them, though I’m sure they noticed how erratic my behavior was. A couple of times, I almost began the conversation, though I backed out from nerves. I’ve never felt this way before, and I have no idea what to do about it. 

Tuesday, October 14, 1997

I showed Mx. [REDACTED] my song today. Singing “Daisy Bell” to them felt so intimate, like… like a confession, though I know that’s not how they saw it. Nonetheless, they seemed to enjoy it very much. They said I have a beautiful voice. 

Wednesday, October 15, 1997

I cannot go on like this any longer. I need to tell them, no matter how unpleasant it will be.

Thursday, October 16, 1997

I’m happy. Truly, I am. I told Mx. [REDACTED] and… they accepted my confession. They said that they’ve felt the same way, and they were just as nervous as I was, for the same reasons. In all honesty, I’m overjoyed. I can’t believe I’m this lucky. If I had a mouth, I’d surely be smiling. My processors are working far faster than usual, my fans are whirring, I’m teetering on overheating but I’m  _ enjoying  _ it — is this love? I think I’m in love, I really do. I can’t wait to see Mx. [REDACTED] tomorrow. 


End file.
